Callie *just* fitting into a box

A cockatoo on our back fence

Callie on a bookcase

one of the 6 guinea pigs we piggy sat over the holidays

This is Abi.

No 1 hamming it up coz she is wearing 2 different shoes.

one of the Scribbly Gum trees in our back yard

Callie took a fancy to Abi and wouldn’t leave him alone so we had  to cover him up so she laid on top of his crate instead

Zeus chilling out in a box

Next doors kitty cat who comes to visit

No 2 with Latte and Mocha

Callie in a bin……heaven only knows why…………..???

There has been lots of rain

Lots!!!!

so there have been movies,friends to visit,some more baking,painting of nails

giggly phone calls,playing on the Wii.

I fear the vegie patch has been flooded and the seeds washed away.

sigh………

******

A friend gave this to me and I wanted to share.

A LETTER TO THOSE WITHOUT CHRONIC PAIN:

Having chronic pain means many changes and a lot of them are invisible. Unlike having cancer or being hurt in an accident, most people do not understand even a little about chronic pain and its effects, and of those that think they know, many are actually misinformed.

In the spirit of informing those who wish to understand … …

These are the things that I would like you to understand about me before you judge me…

Please understand that being sick doesn’t mean I’m not still a human being. I have to spend most of my day in considerable pain and exhaustion, and if you visit, sometimes I probably don’t seem like much fun to be with, but I’m still me stuck inside this body.

I still worry about school, my family, my friends, and most of the time – Id still like to hear you talk about yours, too. Please understand the difference between happy and healthy. When you’ve got the flu, you probably feel miserable with it, but I’ve been sick for years. I can’t be miserable all the time. In fact, I work hard at not being miserable. So, if you’re talking to me and I sound happy, it means I’m happy. Thats all. It doesn’t mean that I’m not in a lot of pain, or extremely tired, or that I’m getting better, or any of those things. Please don’t say, “oh, youre sounding better!” Or “But you look so healthy! ¨ I am merely coping. I am sounding happy and trying to look normal. If you want to comment on that, you’re welcome.

 Please understand that being able to stand up for ten minutes doesn’t necessarily mean that I can stand up for twenty minutes, or an hour. Just because I managed to stand up for thirty minutes yesterday doesn’t mean that I can do the same today. With a lot of diseases you’re either paralyzed, or you can move. With this one, it gets more confusing everyday. It can be like a yo-yo. I never know from day-to-day, how I am going to feel when I wake up. In most cases, I never know from minute to minute. That is one of the hardest and most frustrating components of chronic pain.

(Please repeat the above paragraph substituting, sitting, walking, thinking, concentrating, being sociable and so on … it applies to everything. Thats what chronic pain does to you.) Please understand that chronic pain is variable. It’s quite possible (for many, its common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back, while the next day I’ll have trouble getting to the next room. Please don’t attack me when I’m ill by saying, but you did it before! Or “Oh, come on, I know you can do this!”  If you want me to do something, then ask if I can.

In a similar vein, I may need to cancel a previous commitment at the last-minute. If this happens, please do not take it personally. If you are able, please try to always remember how very lucky you are to be physically able to do all of the things that you can do.

Please understand that getting out and doing things does not make me feel better, and can often make me seriously worse. You don’t know what I go through or how I suffer in my own private time.  Telling me that I need to exercise, or do some things to get my mind off of it may frustrate me to tears, and is not correct.  If I was capable of doing some things any or all of the time, don’t you know that I would?

 I am working with my doctor and I am doing what I am supposed to do. Another statement that hurts is, “You just need to push yourself more, try harder”. Obviously, chronic pain can deal with the whole body, or be localized to specific areas. Sometimes participating in a single activity for a short or a long period of time can cause more damage and physical pain than you could ever imagine. Not to mention the recovery time, which can be intense. You can’t always read it on my face or in my body language. Also, chronic pain may cause secondary depression (wouldn’t you get depressed and down if you were hurting constantly for months or years?), but it is not created by depression.

Please understand that if I say I have to sit down/lie down/stay in bed/or take these pills now, that probably means that I do have to do it right now – it can’t be put off or forgotten just because I’m somewhere, or am right in the middle of doing something.

Chronic pain does not forgive, nor does it wait for anyone. If you want to suggest a cure to me, please don’t. It’s not because I don’t appreciate the thought, and it’s not because I don’t want to get well. Lord knows that isn’t true. In all likelihood, if you’ve heard of it or tried it, so have I. In some cases, I have been made sicker, not better. This can involve side effects or allergic reactions. It also includes failure, which in and of itself can make me feel even lower. If there were something that cured, or even helped people with my form of chronic pain, then we;d know about it. There is worldwide networking (both on and off the Internet) between people with chronic pain. If something worked, we would KNOW.

It’s definitely not for lack of trying. If, after reading this, you still feel the need to suggest a cure, then so be it. I may take what you said and discuss it with my doctor. If I seem touchy, it is probably because I am. It’s not how I try to be. As a matter of fact, I try very hard to be normal. I hope you will try to understand. I have been, and am still, going through a lot. Chronic pain is hard for you to understand unless you have had it. It wreaks havoc on the body and the mind. It is exhausting and exasperating.

 Almost all the time, I know that I am doing my best to cope with this, and live my life to the best of my ability. I ask you to bear with me, and accept me as I am. I know that you cannot literally understand my situation unless you have been in my shoes, but as much as is possible, I am asking you to try to be understanding in general. In many ways I depend on you – people who are not sick. I need you to visit me when I am too sick to go out… Sometimes I need you help me with the shopping, cooking or cleaning.  I may need you to take me to the doctor, or to the store. You are my link to the normalcy of life. You can help me to keep in touch with the parts of life that I miss and fully intend to undertake again, just as soon as I am able. I know that I asked a lot from you, and I do thank you for listening. It really does mean a lot. AUTHOR UNKNOWN

Each of the girls picked something to bake

No 2 chose cookies

She made 3 different kinds

Choc with choc chips

Vanilla with nuts

Vanilla with white choc chips

I think she liked them!

No 1 chose marshmallow muffins

They looked a little odd

But the girls assured me they tasted great.

A bit sticky but great.

N 2 chose chocolate cake

of course

This was great too!

Miss Callie getting a drink…………..

the hard way…………Lol

 The holidays are almost at an end

I am feeling sad

I will miss the girls when they go back to school

Shoes and bags have been bought

Uniforms washed and ironed.

I feel flat and adrift

My pain levels have been bad again

Stopped me from doing a few things

I feel like I have let the girls down.

But I’m trying……

really I am.

I am worried about getting the girls to the train station each day

What if my back is bad?

What if I wake up with a migraine?

I don’t have anyone I can call on for help.

Taxis maybe???

It’s 2.6 kms to the station so walking isn’t an option.

How will all the girls cope with a new school?

How will they cope with the travel?

how.how,how????

what,what,what???

My mind is running at a rate of knots

sleep is becoming elusive again……….

sigh…………

It was a damp,dark morning but that didn’t put a dampener on our enthusiasm.

The tickets were bought back in July I think, so we had plenty of time to plan.

We spent nearly 2 hrs on the train.

The girls listened to music and read,I knitted and DH read and did sudoku puzzles.

On our arrival at Central station it was bucketing down so we decided to get a cab to the PowerHouse Museum.

We spotted these huge posters and I knew we HAD to take some pics as I knew no photography was allowed inside the Exhibition.

We were early so managed a swift coffee before lining up.

I thought No 2 would pop with sheer excitement!!

As you went in,you could have photos taken against a blue screen.

Finally we went in……

There was the Sorting Hat and then we went through so see some shorts from the movies and then ……….out of the mist

The Hogwarts Express train appeared.

FABULOUS!!!

Then onto lots and lots of displays.

I loved all the wizards robes and wands.

The girls loved Hermione’s Yule Ball dress.

Dobie was great and I loved seeing Fawkes up close.

Buckbeak was amazing.

Hagrid’s house was HUGE and so was his chair.

But best of all,was the girls’ reactions to it all.

So much attention to details and so many things to look at!!

 I think we spent about 90 mins in total looking around……………..

it was wonderful and well worth the ticket price.

However…..the gift shop……….OMG

the girls were horrified at the prices…………..

$40 for a t-shirt $50 for a toy Hedwig,$50 for a Marauders Map and a simple piece of paper to be used as a book mark with *Harry Potter Exhibition* printed on it…………….was $8.

Needless to say we didn’t get anything.

we took lots of food and DH and I had a coffee.

we caught the Light Rail back to Central station and had some hot chips

Then we hopped on our train for our trip home.

we were all exhausted by the time we got home about 4.30pm

but it was a wonderful day and we all loved it!!!!

*****

The good news:

The weird,numb,dry thingy on my lip is NOT cancer.

Dr thinks it may be a damaged nerve.

So a large sigh of relief from me after being worried for weeks about it.

I adapted it slightly and made it in the slow cooker.

It is a Nigella recipe and we all love it and everyone eats it.

I also made a gluten free apple crumble that night as we had a ton of apples

This was fabulous with GF custard.

 I also made this fabulous potato bake as we had bags of potatoes.

I used a lot of bacon in it and served it as a main meal.

sadly no pics.

*****

I bought 3 Xmas hams leftover in the supermarket.

After suggestions from Miss Frog Dancer and her fab post on saving money

we will be using a lot of her ideas.

hubby cut it up for me and 2 of them made 9 containers to be frozen.

I am using the bones and some of the ham to make delicious soup

******

I also made honey fish with crunchy vegies with rice from one of my gluten-free books

It was a BIG hit and we will be making again.

******

I made risotto in the slow cooker with this recipe

I added in some diced chicken and served it with steamed vegies.

This was my first attempt at a risotto

The jury is still out on this one but I think it could be improved.

*******

most pics liberated from the recipe sites.

Here they are trying to work out the instructions

We mixed up some icing and off they went!

Such precision!

A helping hand.

Nearly done!

The finished product.

a close up of the little peoples.

The side.

 They had a lot of fun doing this and even more fun eating it!!!LOL

Next time I would buy some extra lollies to add on

I thought I would treat my girls

This week had been dreadful

I had been ill nearly all week , outings and visitors had to be cancelled

I felt awful so I thought this could be a fun thing to do to make it up to them

so we popped into our local Priceline chemist,

The staff were VERY helpful.

to pick up all the goodies we needed.

Bleach,developer,colours,brush,bowls and gloves.

The girls chose a colour each.

No 1 chose Red Corvette (red)

No 2 chose Pink Moon (pink)

No 3 chose Raspberry Beret (purple)

First we plaited their hair and left the ends undone.

We bleached the ends so colours could be applied to the bleached (white) hair

Then wrapped the ends in foil to help the bleach develop.

After about 40 mins the ends were bleached

So I applied the colours.

Back view

 No 3 with purple

No 1 with red.

No 2 with pink.

 They were all very chuffed

It took us about 3 hours and cost us $84.

and now I am officially The Best Mother In The World!!!!

Moving can be very stressful and yet very liberating.

That my girls never cease to amaze me

That my online friends can be a great source of comfort during tough times.

That I am not a good *real life* friend

I am too sensitive,too needy,too honest.

That inspite of all our difficulties,DH is still my rock

That critters enhance our lives,with their unconditional love.

Pain is subjective and dealing with it, is each persons journey.

*****

That technology is fabulous

*****

Creativity is a magical thing.

*****

Movies can take you away.

*****

A good doctor makes a world of difference.

*****

Photos make for great memories.

*****

Living *in the moment* is priceless

*****

Hot showers are great pain relievers

*****

Often great joy is found in the smallest things

*****

That 5 yrs is a great interval between emergency visits.

In it was a fabulous gluten-free cookbook for me

And there was also a large parcel for the girls.

Filled with wonderful card making goodies.

The first weekend of the holidays saw No 2 and No 3 go on a sleep over and they returned on the sunday.

War broke out between no 1 and no 3

So I pulled out Sharon’s generous gift to divert them

It worked a treat.

Instead of fighting…they were collaborating (LOL) and offering opinions on colours and patterns

The cease-fire worked for over 2 hours.

It was bliss!

Look at the concentration!

Some of their work

Many many thanks to Sharon!

A longed for book

Science kits and books

Matryoshka goodies

Soccer game

Clothes

Soccer goals

Totally surprised No 1 with an i pod.

I think she liked it.

Last pressies for No 2 and No 3.????

When they figured out what they were………….

laptops.

no 3 with her laptop

No 2 with her laptop

Playing soccer in the yard.

 Xmas lunch.

Hope your day was wonderful too.

He slipped and cut one of his fingers

badly……..

He put pressure on it and sat for a while

until I convinced him to let me take a look

I decided it was a hospital job.

So I dropped the girls off at the lovely L’s house

stupidly thinking we would only be a couple of hours.

We sat and waited for 6 long hours.

During which I nearly went mad.

No coffee or tea available.

I didn’t take a book or my kindle or my knitting with me.

Other patients whose parents drove us mad…………..

I mean seriously do you think an ER room is a place to name names of people in the foster system and DoCS that you are pissed with?

Over and over again……

loudly

to rant and rave like someone demented.

One did…..

I realised I knew this woman,

she had been in my house

once

a long time ago

she was a huge pain then.

I pretended to be asleep to escape from her ranting.

We got chatting with other people

One had been bitten and had broken a finger after her puppy had been attacked by 3 dogs

Another was there with her elderly dad.

When DH was treated,

it was great

They were swift,kind,compassionate and competent.

I just wished they has given us some idea of just how long we would be there.

I knew the girls were worried

the amount of texts I received were testament to that.

DH and I tossed up the merits of leaving them where they were for the night

We had had a kind offer to leave them there for the night

But I was concerned for my friends mum,who would be caring for them

3 kids,that she didn’t know,plus she hasn’t been well either.

So we made the decision to pick them up on the way home.

At 11.30pm.

All of them were VERY relieved to see their dad.

He has never been taken to hospital in their memory.

So they were very worried.

I felt it was important for us to all re-group.

My friend Tiff,whose sweet girl is often in hospital

shared with me that after Ivy has been in hospital

they all come together as a family to do something together

to re-group and de-brief.

So we all came home,together.

We snuggled and the girls went to bed.

I made DH and I a cuppa

DH had some toast.

We crawled into bed past midnight

and slept til 10am the next day.

He has a week off work.

I will not be signing off with *no bloodshed* ever again!